Who Am I?

Ever felt lost, confused, or alone? These feelings often stem from one core question: Who am I? At Congruency, we believe the answer to this question is the key to breaking free from where you are.

I've been there. For years, I had a ready answer when asked, "What do you do?" I'd proudly say, "I'm a baseball player." But deep down, a more unsettling question kept me awake at night: "Who are you really, and who are you becoming?

This is all about identity. Today, let's explore three questions that often come up in our coaching sessions when someone's struggling to define themselves.

1. What Story Am I living?

Our lives are shaped by stories. These stories shape the way we see the world, the people around us, and the reason we are here on earth. We're all living out some version of a story that defines the “good life" for us. Usually, there are four main ways we think the "good life" is achieved:

- What we do.

- What we have.

- What we produce.

- What others say about us. 

These stories shape everything - from the house we want to the job we choose, even the pictures we post online.

Here's the catch: we often tie our value and worth to these stories. But is that really who we are?

2. What Identity Is Getting Elevated? 

Your identity is the safest thing about you. It's the core of who you are, something no one can take away unless you let them.

We all wear multiple hats: parent, spouse, child, athlete, CEO, student, friend - the list goes on. Having multiple identities isn't the problem. The issue arises when we elevate the wrong identity, especially one tied to those "good life" stories we talked about earlier.

When my identity as a baseball player was front and center, and I tied my worth to my performance...well, let's just say it wasn't pretty when I didn't perform well. I lived in constant fear, unsure if I'd have a job tomorrow or end up on my couch.

Living like this is like riding a roller coaster without a safety bar. You're holding on for dear life, feeling like you could be thrown off at any second.

Bottom line: When we elevate the wrong identity and try to find our value in the wrong story, life feels pretty scary.

3. Whose Voice Is The Loudest?

This final question, equally crucial, is about the voice that rings loudest in our ears. We're constantly surrounded by a chorus of opinions, all trying to define us. Our identities are shaped by the voices we allow into our lives: from loved ones to leaders, from social media to the stories we consume.

Remember, you have the power to choose which voice you listen to. It's okay to consider others' opinions, but don't let them define who you are.

This topic is a hot button in our home. Our kids are reaching the age where they think they need cell phones. But here's the thing: we're holding off, and it's all because of this question.

Giving our children phones opens the floodgates to a sea of new voices, ones that weren't there before. If our kids aren't secure in who they are before these voices enter their world, it's like sending them into battle unarmed. These new influences will try to mold our children's self-image, appearance, and behavior—who they are. We need our kids to have a strong sense of self, and to recognize our guiding voice amidst the noise.

These three questions - about our life story, our core identity, and the voices we listen to - always surface during our coaching sessions. These meetings are designed to be purposeful, creating a safe space for people to dig deep, tackle these big questions, and take charge of their personal growth.

What’s Next?

At Congruency, we're here to help you answer that big question: "Who am I?" It's a journey of self-discovery and self-awareness, and while it might seem daunting, it's also incredibly rewarding.

So, take a moment. Breathe. Ask yourself these questions. You might be surprised by what you discover about yourself. Remember, you're not alone on this journey. We're here to support you every step of the way.

We're on a mission to help you make your invisible life visible. We want to shine a light on the parts of you that might be hiding in the shadows, so you can break free from what's holding you back and become the person you were created to be. 

Ready to dive deeper? You've got options. You can schedule a session with one of our Congruency Coaches to work through questions like these. Or, if you're short on time but still want insights, try our Free Assessment. In just 10-15 minutes, you'll get a clear picture of what's going on beneath the surface. Remember, knowing who you were created to be is the first step to doing all that you've been designed to do. 

So, are you ready to start your journey toward Congruency?